Easily the best article of the day: Man Commits Suicide After Sex with Hen.
Loving the last sentence:
"The hen was slaughtered after the incident. "
At least the home wrecking hussy got what was coming to her.
May 28, 2004
May 22, 2004
I didn't even know they sold church steeples as accessories.
Now tell me again "the comptroller never favors one religion over another"?
May 21, 2004
Carole Keeton Strayhorn: The lesser of two evils steps it up a notch.
Texas official says Unitarian church not a tax-exempt religion
BY R.A. DYER Knight Ridder Newspapers
AUSTIN, Texas - (KRT) - Unitarian Universalists have for decades presided over births, marriages and memorials. The church operates in every state, with more than 5,000 members in Texas alone.
But according to the office of Texas Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn, a Texas Unitarian church isn't really a religious organization - at least for tax purposes. Its reasoning: The organization "does not have one system of belief."
Never before - not in this state nor any other - has a government agency denied Unitarians tax-exempt status because of the group's religious philosophy, church officials say. Strayhorn's ruling clearly infringes upon religious liberties, said Dan Althoff, board president for the Denison, Texas, congregation that was rejected for tax exemption by the comptroller's office.
"I was surprised - surprised and shocked - because the Unitarian church in the United States has a very long history," said Althoff, who notes that father-and-son presidents John Adams and John Quincy Adams were both Unitarians.
Strayhorn's ruling, as well as a similar decision by former Comptroller John Sharp, has left the comptroller's office straddling a sometimes murky gulf separating church and state.
What constitutes religion? When and how should government make that determination? Questions that for years have vexed the world's great philosophers have now become the province of the state comptroller's office.
Questions about the issue were referred to Jesse Ancira, the comptroller's top lawyer, who said Strayhorn has applied a consistent standard - and then stuck to it. For any organization to qualify as a religion, members must have "simply a belief in God, or gods, or a higher power," he said.
"We have got to apply a test, and use some objective standards," Ancira said. "We're not using the test to deny the exemptions for a particular group because we like them or don't like them."
Since Strayhorn took over in January 1999, the comptroller's office has denied religious tax-exempt status to 17 groups and granted them to more than 1,000, according to records obtained by the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. Although there are exceptions, the lion's share of approvals have gone to groups that appear to have relatively traditional faiths, records show.
But of the denials, at least a fourth include less traditional groups. In addition to the Denison Unitarian church, the rejected groups include a Carrollton, Texas, group of atheists and agnostics, a New Age group in Bastrop, Texas, and the Whispering Star Clan/Temple of Ancient Wisdom, an organization of witches in Copperas Cove, Texas.
Some of the denials occurred because of missing paperwork or other problems, according to the comptroller's office. A few, like the denial for the New Age group and the witches group, were decided because their services were closed to the public, according to documents.
But the denials of the Red River Unitarian Universalist Church in Denison, the North Texas Church of Freethought in Carrollton, and an earlier denial by Sharp for the Ethical Culture Fellowship of Austin, were ordered because the organizations did not mandate belief in a supreme being.
The disputed tax dollars don't amount to much, but the comptroller has taken a stand on principle, Ancira said.
"The issue as a whole is, Do you want to open up a system where there can be abuse or fraud, or where any group can proclaim itself to be a religious organization and take advantage of the exception?" he said.
Those who oppose the comptroller's "God, gods or supreme being" test say that it can discriminate against legitimate faiths. For example, applying that standard could disqualify Buddhism because it does not mandate belief in a supreme being, critics say.
Opponents note that the federal government applies less stringent rules for federal tax exemptions and yet manages to discourage fraud and abuse. They also question whether the comptroller's office has formulated excuses to discriminate against nontraditional groups, such as those that include witches and pagans.
But Ancira says it's up to the comptroller's office to interpret state law, which he describes as rather vague. He insists the comptroller never favors one religion over another.
"This comptroller, in particular, wants everybody on a level playing field," he said.
The comptroller's office has not always barred "creedless" religions from tax exemption, said Douglas Laycock, a University of Texas law professor who specializes in religious liberty issues.
That standard first came up in 1997, when then-Comptroller Sharp ruled against the Ethical Culture Fellowship of Austin. In making that decision, Sharp overturned the recommendation of his staff.
The Ethical Culture Fellowship sued, claiming that Sharp overstepped his authority. Allied with the group in the ongoing lawsuit are pastors from a broad range of faiths, including Baptists, Lutherans and Mennonites.
Both the lower court and the Texas Supreme Court have ruled against the state's decision. In one opinion, an appeals court said the comptroller's test "fails to include the whole range of belief systems that may, in our diverse and pluralistic society, merit the First Amendment protection."
Strayhorn vows to continue the legal fight to the U.S. Supreme Court, if necessary. "Otherwise, any wannabe cult who dresses up and parades down Sixth Street on Halloween will be applying for an exemption," she said in an April 23 news release.
The Red River Unitarian Universalist Church, the 50-member congregation whose tax application was rejected by Strayhorn's office, has held services in Denison for seven years. Althoff said his group includes "hard-core atheists" as well as "New Agey-type people."
But the lack of a single creed is a hallmark of Unitarianism, Althoff said. Instead, Unitarian Universalists have seven guiding principles, including "respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part," according to the Unitarian Universalist Web site.
The group also draws from various religious and philosophical traditions, including Jewish, Christian, humanist and Earth-centered teachings, but promotes individual freedom of belief, according to the Web site. It notes that Unitarians and Universalists have operated in the United States for at least 200 years, although the two groups did not merge until 1961.
It now includes about 40 congregations in Texas, and more than 1,000 in the United States, Canada and Mexico.
Despite its lack of a specific creed, Unitarian Universalism is as much a religion as any other, Althoff said. From his perspective, religion is not just about the answers to life's big questions, but also calls on people to evaluate the questions themselves.
"It seems to me that any (group) that is specifically organized to address and explore the issues of what constitutes the good life, both here and perhaps in the afterworld, would qualify" as a religion, Althoff said.
The Rev. Anthony David, lead pastor of Pathways Church in Southlake, Texas, said he is disturbed by the comptroller's decision because it ignores Unitarian Universalists' belief that spiritual fulfillment can emerge in "different ways at different levels."
"It reflects an incredible misunderstanding of what a church needs to look like," David said.
Pathways teaches that God is a term that describes the source of ultimate meaning and purpose, but the church does not advocate a one size fits all theology, David said.
"Creedlessness doesn't mean no belief or anything goes," he said.
Craig Roshaven of Fort Worth's First Jefferson Unitarian Universalist Church said he has followed the comptroller's decisions with growing dismay.
His group has tax-exempt status, but he wonders what's to prevent Strayhorn from revoking it.
"The comptroller's same logic could be applied to any of us," he said.
Ancira said the comptroller's office has no plans for such reversals. But, then again, said Ancira, "there's nothing preventing us from doing so."
(Staff writer Darren Barbee contributed to this report.)
© 2004, Fort Worth Star-Telegram.
BY R.A. DYER Knight Ridder Newspapers
AUSTIN, Texas - (KRT) - Unitarian Universalists have for decades presided over births, marriages and memorials. The church operates in every state, with more than 5,000 members in Texas alone.
But according to the office of Texas Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn, a Texas Unitarian church isn't really a religious organization - at least for tax purposes. Its reasoning: The organization "does not have one system of belief."
Never before - not in this state nor any other - has a government agency denied Unitarians tax-exempt status because of the group's religious philosophy, church officials say. Strayhorn's ruling clearly infringes upon religious liberties, said Dan Althoff, board president for the Denison, Texas, congregation that was rejected for tax exemption by the comptroller's office.
"I was surprised - surprised and shocked - because the Unitarian church in the United States has a very long history," said Althoff, who notes that father-and-son presidents John Adams and John Quincy Adams were both Unitarians.
Strayhorn's ruling, as well as a similar decision by former Comptroller John Sharp, has left the comptroller's office straddling a sometimes murky gulf separating church and state.
What constitutes religion? When and how should government make that determination? Questions that for years have vexed the world's great philosophers have now become the province of the state comptroller's office.
Questions about the issue were referred to Jesse Ancira, the comptroller's top lawyer, who said Strayhorn has applied a consistent standard - and then stuck to it. For any organization to qualify as a religion, members must have "simply a belief in God, or gods, or a higher power," he said.
"We have got to apply a test, and use some objective standards," Ancira said. "We're not using the test to deny the exemptions for a particular group because we like them or don't like them."
Since Strayhorn took over in January 1999, the comptroller's office has denied religious tax-exempt status to 17 groups and granted them to more than 1,000, according to records obtained by the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. Although there are exceptions, the lion's share of approvals have gone to groups that appear to have relatively traditional faiths, records show.
But of the denials, at least a fourth include less traditional groups. In addition to the Denison Unitarian church, the rejected groups include a Carrollton, Texas, group of atheists and agnostics, a New Age group in Bastrop, Texas, and the Whispering Star Clan/Temple of Ancient Wisdom, an organization of witches in Copperas Cove, Texas.
Some of the denials occurred because of missing paperwork or other problems, according to the comptroller's office. A few, like the denial for the New Age group and the witches group, were decided because their services were closed to the public, according to documents.
But the denials of the Red River Unitarian Universalist Church in Denison, the North Texas Church of Freethought in Carrollton, and an earlier denial by Sharp for the Ethical Culture Fellowship of Austin, were ordered because the organizations did not mandate belief in a supreme being.
The disputed tax dollars don't amount to much, but the comptroller has taken a stand on principle, Ancira said.
"The issue as a whole is, Do you want to open up a system where there can be abuse or fraud, or where any group can proclaim itself to be a religious organization and take advantage of the exception?" he said.
Those who oppose the comptroller's "God, gods or supreme being" test say that it can discriminate against legitimate faiths. For example, applying that standard could disqualify Buddhism because it does not mandate belief in a supreme being, critics say.
Opponents note that the federal government applies less stringent rules for federal tax exemptions and yet manages to discourage fraud and abuse. They also question whether the comptroller's office has formulated excuses to discriminate against nontraditional groups, such as those that include witches and pagans.
But Ancira says it's up to the comptroller's office to interpret state law, which he describes as rather vague. He insists the comptroller never favors one religion over another.
"This comptroller, in particular, wants everybody on a level playing field," he said.
The comptroller's office has not always barred "creedless" religions from tax exemption, said Douglas Laycock, a University of Texas law professor who specializes in religious liberty issues.
That standard first came up in 1997, when then-Comptroller Sharp ruled against the Ethical Culture Fellowship of Austin. In making that decision, Sharp overturned the recommendation of his staff.
The Ethical Culture Fellowship sued, claiming that Sharp overstepped his authority. Allied with the group in the ongoing lawsuit are pastors from a broad range of faiths, including Baptists, Lutherans and Mennonites.
Both the lower court and the Texas Supreme Court have ruled against the state's decision. In one opinion, an appeals court said the comptroller's test "fails to include the whole range of belief systems that may, in our diverse and pluralistic society, merit the First Amendment protection."
Strayhorn vows to continue the legal fight to the U.S. Supreme Court, if necessary. "Otherwise, any wannabe cult who dresses up and parades down Sixth Street on Halloween will be applying for an exemption," she said in an April 23 news release.
The Red River Unitarian Universalist Church, the 50-member congregation whose tax application was rejected by Strayhorn's office, has held services in Denison for seven years. Althoff said his group includes "hard-core atheists" as well as "New Agey-type people."
But the lack of a single creed is a hallmark of Unitarianism, Althoff said. Instead, Unitarian Universalists have seven guiding principles, including "respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part," according to the Unitarian Universalist Web site.
The group also draws from various religious and philosophical traditions, including Jewish, Christian, humanist and Earth-centered teachings, but promotes individual freedom of belief, according to the Web site. It notes that Unitarians and Universalists have operated in the United States for at least 200 years, although the two groups did not merge until 1961.
It now includes about 40 congregations in Texas, and more than 1,000 in the United States, Canada and Mexico.
Despite its lack of a specific creed, Unitarian Universalism is as much a religion as any other, Althoff said. From his perspective, religion is not just about the answers to life's big questions, but also calls on people to evaluate the questions themselves.
"It seems to me that any (group) that is specifically organized to address and explore the issues of what constitutes the good life, both here and perhaps in the afterworld, would qualify" as a religion, Althoff said.
The Rev. Anthony David, lead pastor of Pathways Church in Southlake, Texas, said he is disturbed by the comptroller's decision because it ignores Unitarian Universalists' belief that spiritual fulfillment can emerge in "different ways at different levels."
"It reflects an incredible misunderstanding of what a church needs to look like," David said.
Pathways teaches that God is a term that describes the source of ultimate meaning and purpose, but the church does not advocate a one size fits all theology, David said.
"Creedlessness doesn't mean no belief or anything goes," he said.
Craig Roshaven of Fort Worth's First Jefferson Unitarian Universalist Church said he has followed the comptroller's decisions with growing dismay.
His group has tax-exempt status, but he wonders what's to prevent Strayhorn from revoking it.
"The comptroller's same logic could be applied to any of us," he said.
Ancira said the comptroller's office has no plans for such reversals. But, then again, said Ancira, "there's nothing preventing us from doing so."
(Staff writer Darren Barbee contributed to this report.)
© 2004, Fort Worth Star-Telegram.
May 17, 2004
Iraq the Model
"Yes, we should put our hands in each other’s because we have a common destiny." - from an Iraqi blog.
Which sign of the apocalypse is this?
Well, to be fair, May does have a history of apocalypses...
The Quizno's Spongemonkeys have been outdone by the Subservient Chicken.
The Quizno's Spongemonkeys have been outdone by the Subservient Chicken.
May 10, 2004
"What about prom Blaine?"
Thought this was a great idea for a charity: Florida Teen Leaves Dress Charity as Legacy. And how hard could it be to donate? If you too have an old prom dress laying around, unused, at the bottom of a rubbermaid storage bin, visit Becca's Closet to donate. Think there's actually some needy girl out there who wants my harlot red, floor length, Scarlet O'Hara number, circa 1996?
April 30, 2004
April goes bye-bye.
Happy Birthday to Grandma Shirley and Aunt Martha- who have interchangeable birthdays!
April 28, 2004
Attack of the Killer Snails!
I am so freaked out about these! Giant Snails Seized From Schools. The size of a person's hand. A hand! Hand sized snails! Am I the only one feeling the hysteria?"They are concerned the snails, about the size of a person's hand, could be transported to states with warmer climates, where they can rapidly reproduce and destroy plants." Um, and my sanity?
"In 1966, a Miami boy smuggled three Giant African Land Snails into the country. His grandmother eventually released them into a garden, and in seven years there were more than 18,000 of them. The eradication program took 10 years, according to the USDA." This is a horror movie waiting to happen.
April 23, 2004
Happy Belated Earth Day!
This was taken (without permission I guess) from a transcript of last night's Anderson Cooper 360° (he's so dreamy) on CNN.
COOPER: In case you didn't already know, today is Earth Day. For the past 34 years a day dedicated to saving the planet and fighting pollution. The environment has largely been a back burner issue in this presidential campaign. But today President Bush and Senator Kerry thought it prudent to promote their green agendas. But as we found out today talking clean air can be dirty business in raw politics. Take a look.
COOPER: To talk about the environment, President Bush traveled to coastal Maine.
GEORGE W. BUSH, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: It's a day that reminds us that we must be good stewards of the land around us.
COOPER: John Kerry flew to smoggy Houston.
SEN. JOHN KERRY (D-MA), PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE: We are going to set a goal that by the year 2020, 20 percent of America's electricity is going to be produced by alternative and renewable sources.
COOPER: Yet at the end of this earth day, these nice green words went up in smoke. Literally. Take a look. To reach Wells National Reserve in Maine, President Bush rode on Marine One, from the White House south lawn to Andrews Air Force Base. The ten-mile trip burned up an estimated 16 gallons of fuel. He then flew on Air Force One to Sanford, Maine. That's another 882 gallons according to our estimate. Now double that for the return trip. Also add the 2.5 gallons he used to drive 30 miles in an SUV. In all, his 20-minute long speech to shore up efforts to expand wetlands cost about 1,800 gallons of fuel. What about John Kerry?
KERRY: You see these signs...
COOPER: He flew on a Boeing 727 from New Orleans to Houston. That's an estimated 1,000 gallons of fuel. Flying back to Washington, D.C. gobbles an estimated 4,000 gallons. He rode approximately 58 miles in an SUV, that's about 5 gallons. In all his 30-minute long Earth Day speech consumed some 5,000 gallons of fuel. And that's not all. Don't forget the dozens of aides, Secret Service, local police and press corps that follow the candidates around. Today, Kerry's motorcade in Houston was about 15 cars long. Funny, isn't it? In the world of raw politics talking green certainly does require a lot of gas.
COOPER: In case you didn't already know, today is Earth Day. For the past 34 years a day dedicated to saving the planet and fighting pollution. The environment has largely been a back burner issue in this presidential campaign. But today President Bush and Senator Kerry thought it prudent to promote their green agendas. But as we found out today talking clean air can be dirty business in raw politics. Take a look.
COOPER: To talk about the environment, President Bush traveled to coastal Maine.
GEORGE W. BUSH, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: It's a day that reminds us that we must be good stewards of the land around us.
COOPER: John Kerry flew to smoggy Houston.
SEN. JOHN KERRY (D-MA), PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE: We are going to set a goal that by the year 2020, 20 percent of America's electricity is going to be produced by alternative and renewable sources.
COOPER: Yet at the end of this earth day, these nice green words went up in smoke. Literally. Take a look. To reach Wells National Reserve in Maine, President Bush rode on Marine One, from the White House south lawn to Andrews Air Force Base. The ten-mile trip burned up an estimated 16 gallons of fuel. He then flew on Air Force One to Sanford, Maine. That's another 882 gallons according to our estimate. Now double that for the return trip. Also add the 2.5 gallons he used to drive 30 miles in an SUV. In all, his 20-minute long speech to shore up efforts to expand wetlands cost about 1,800 gallons of fuel. What about John Kerry?
KERRY: You see these signs...
COOPER: He flew on a Boeing 727 from New Orleans to Houston. That's an estimated 1,000 gallons of fuel. Flying back to Washington, D.C. gobbles an estimated 4,000 gallons. He rode approximately 58 miles in an SUV, that's about 5 gallons. In all his 30-minute long Earth Day speech consumed some 5,000 gallons of fuel. And that's not all. Don't forget the dozens of aides, Secret Service, local police and press corps that follow the candidates around. Today, Kerry's motorcade in Houston was about 15 cars long. Funny, isn't it? In the world of raw politics talking green certainly does require a lot of gas.
April 15, 2004
Bad Idea Jeans
"Normally I wear protection... but then I figured, when am I gonna make it back to Haiti?"
And Jack Osbourne too?
Mark your calendars kids! New York Minute, the Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen extravaganza hits theaters May 7. How am I supposed to wait three whole weeks?
April 09, 2004
No Apologies
Yesterday, being the tenth anniversary of Kurt Cobain's suicide (or the anniversary of when it was announced, which is how I measure the years) I was hoping to have something to say. Something witty, something nostalgic, or maybe just something to mark the loss, which still feels surprisingly raw. But I didn't have anything to say. Maybe it was all said, ten years ago, when we laid around, watching MTV tributes all night long? Or maybe four days later, when Hole's album came out and briefly stunned us out of the grief? Or maybe I never had the words in the first place. In the wake of the bastard way some people chose to honor Kurt's legacy this week, it was hard to find something worthy of reading. MSN's Slate chose the right direction when they analyzed Courtney Love, her irritating antics, the shadow she'll always live in, and Live Through This, the album that healed us for a while.
April 02, 2004
Happy Birthday!
John Curry officially becomes as old as the hills today.
Oh! And belated happy birthday to my aunt Laurie, who is one of the many, many, many March birthdays.
Oh! And belated happy birthday to my aunt Laurie, who is one of the many, many, many March birthdays.
March 29, 2004
Not A Bile-Free Post
Since I swear that this is not an "Angel" blog, this will be my last post on the subject for some time. I try to remain mostly spoiler-free when it comes to "Angel". I know from experience, that the show can be so great when everything is a surprise. For most other shows, I'm all over the spoilers, checking IMDb and E!Online, because who really cares if the big Ross-Rachel pairing at the end of "Friends" is out of the bag?. It's become really hard to check out the Slayage links and avoid any spoilery ones. And this is especially true considering that the damned show has been cancelled. So I'm hoping for a really great series finale, right? Full of lots of surprises, unexpected twists and guest stars. But it's really freakin' hard to be spoiler free when you have MSN, IMDb and TV Guide trumpeting their headline: Sarah Michelle Gellar Out of 'Angel' Finale. It wasn't enough for them to ruin last year's "Buffy" finale by spewing all over the net about how Spike was going to be on season five of "Angel" and therefore couldn't exactly die in the final "Buffy: episode? No, I guess that wasn't enough.
Finally, in non-Angel related news: Feel free to admire my new daisy!
March 22, 2004
I'm Going to Hell
Do you really want to feed the children? C'mon, you can tell me the truth. Seriously. We're all friends here. For the cost of a cup of coffee a day, you could save Angel instead!
March 15, 2004
Blazing the Oregon Trail
And big congratulations to Shug and Kim, who took Portland up on their offer!
I Love Jordan Catalano Always
One day I will learn my lesson about wearing shirts with words on them. Every time some idiot asks "what does your shirt say?" so that I can read aloud to them, or every time they stare at it and read it aloud for themselves, I swear again, no more wearing shirts with words. And then today, one of the office creeps (yeah, you heard me, not the, but one of the) leaned in so that he can pause three inches from my chest to read the charity slogan across my boobs. And no, the print isn't that small. I might just be cured of t-shirts.
Mom sent me this link today. Teenagers are so much cooler than they used to be.
Mom sent me this link today. Teenagers are so much cooler than they used to be.
March 11, 2004
Generic Tivo and Torture Devices
The world seems to be turning slower. There's poor Martha Stewart, there's OJ Simpson stealing cable, there's The Apprentice, and that's it.
I had my bottom braces put on Tuesday. Why didn't anyone tell me how incredibly painful this process is? I haven't had anything good to eat since Monday, and I'm too busy feeling sorry for myself to enjoy the milkshakes I get to have. In addition to the bottom braces, and banding one of my top molars (because I broke the bracket), my orthodontist installed something called 'buttons' on the inside of my top row of teeth. Supposedly the buttons are so they can attach rubber bands later and stretch my jaw into different directions, but I'm becoming more and more convinced that she's a sadistic psycho, and I'm her Frankenstein experiment.
We finally got digital cable and the DVR from Time Warner. The DVR (Time Warner's version of the Tivo) is my new best friend. I have it recording Scrubs all season since the NBC idiots moved it to Tuesday nights, so we never catch it anymore. I'm also recording Significant Others the new show from Bravo, just because the previews looked good. The DVR is so easy to use, and we can watch our shows whenever we want, instead of being unable to leave the house because Angel is on. And no, Time Warner doesn't pay me to say this stuff. Wait until I get the first bill, then we won't be best friends anymore.
I had my bottom braces put on Tuesday. Why didn't anyone tell me how incredibly painful this process is? I haven't had anything good to eat since Monday, and I'm too busy feeling sorry for myself to enjoy the milkshakes I get to have. In addition to the bottom braces, and banding one of my top molars (because I broke the bracket), my orthodontist installed something called 'buttons' on the inside of my top row of teeth. Supposedly the buttons are so they can attach rubber bands later and stretch my jaw into different directions, but I'm becoming more and more convinced that she's a sadistic psycho, and I'm her Frankenstein experiment.
We finally got digital cable and the DVR from Time Warner. The DVR (Time Warner's version of the Tivo) is my new best friend. I have it recording Scrubs all season since the NBC idiots moved it to Tuesday nights, so we never catch it anymore. I'm also recording Significant Others the new show from Bravo, just because the previews looked good. The DVR is so easy to use, and we can watch our shows whenever we want, instead of being unable to leave the house because Angel is on. And no, Time Warner doesn't pay me to say this stuff. Wait until I get the first bill, then we won't be best friends anymore.
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