Emmy Nominations

It's official. Holly Hunter has been nominated for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series for "Saving Grace". Everyone else? Might as well stay home.

15 days until Breaking Dawn

"Now let me treat your hand- you've gotten the cut dirty."

"Let me do it, please."

He took my hand and smiled as he examined it. "This doesn't bother me anymore."

I watched him carefully as he cleaned the gash, looking for some sign of distress. He continued to breathe evenly in and out, the same small smile on his lips.

"Why not?" I finally asked as he smoothed a bandage across my palm.

He shrugged. "I got over it."

"You... got over it? When? How?" I tried to remember the last time he'd held his breath around me. All I could think of was my wretched birthday party last September.

Edward pursed his lips, seeming to search for the words. "I lived through an entire twenty-four hours thinking that you were dead, Bella. That changed the way I look at a lot of things."


Eclipse

16 days until Breaking Dawn

"Bella?" Alice asked in a sad voice, shifting over and curling against my side. Her voice sounded so miserable that I wrapped my arms around her shoulders in comfort.

"What's wrong Alice?"

"Don't you love me?" she asked in that same sad tone.

"Of course I do. You know that."

"Then why do I see you sneaking off to Vegas to get married without inviting me?"


Eclipse

17 days until Breaking Dawn

"Now, I want to do this right. Please, please, keep in mind that you've already agreed to this, and don't ruin it for me."

"Oh, no," I gasped as he slid down onto one knee.

"Be nice," he muttered.

I took a deep breath.

"Isabella Swan?" He looked up at me through his impossibly long lashes, his golden eyes soft but, somehow, still scorching. "I promise to love you forever- every single day of forever. Will you marry me?"

There were many things I wanted to say, some of them not nice at all, and others more digustingly gooey and romantic than he probably dreamed I was capable of. Rather than embarass myself with either, I whispered, "Yes."

"Thank you," he said simply. He took my left hand and kissed each of my fingertips before he kissed the ring that was now mine.


Eclipse

Have I mentioned lately...

that I have the cutest kid ever? For real.

Only if you hate the summer camp counselors of America...

Should Parents Take ADHD Kids Off Meds in Summer?

Although their intention may be to avoid sticking their child with a "problem" label at camp, the effect is often just the opposite; counselors and camp directors, who review all campers' health forms before a session begins, are more likely to misread a camper's disobedience as insubordination or a discipline issue if they don't understand the disorder behind it. Jeff Freedman, the director of Camp Winaukee, an all-boys' sports camp in New Hampshire, says that's the case for a handful of his campers each summer: a boy is having a hard time following directions, Freedman calls the parents, and the parents say they forgot to mention that the child is typically medicated for ADHD.

I've got news for you sneaky parents. We always knew exactly what you had done.

Many camp activities, such as water sports or archery, can be dangerous if kids aren't paying enough attention, says Walton. And a child with ADHD may have a harder time dealing with camp's intense social environment if he is taking a hiatus from his regular treatment. Beyond the effect on campers, Walton says drug holidays can also put an "unfair burden" on the counselors. "It's difficult to ask someone who's just meeting your child, just forming a relationship and trying to keep them safe and happy, to do that if the kid is not at his best."

For some ADHD kids, medications help with social interaction, allowing them to better read social cues and exercise self-control. Carrie Wilkerson says—with maternal adoration, of course—that when her son Mark is off his meds, "it makes him very, very annoying." He chatters uncontrollably and laughs nervously at inappropriate times, she says. And that kind of behavior probably wouldn't go over all that well at a campfire sing-a-longs.

so many things going on here

I still can't decide which I find most objectionable; the wig or the make-up. I really hope that the film's make-up person knows a little bit more about subtlety.

Okay, so I still squealed like a little fan-girl when I saw it. But December 12th?? That's like 151 days away! That's a whole nother countdown.






Edited to add: When did anyone stand around in the water? But I like this photo far better.

18 days until Breaking Dawn

I reached for the ring, but his long fingers beat me there. He took my left hand in his, and slid the ring into place on my third finger. He held my hand out, and we both examined the oval sparkling against my skin. It wasn't quite as awful as I'd feared, having it there.

"A perfect fit," he said indifferently. "That's nice- saves me a trip the jeweler's."

I could hear some strong emotion burning under his casual tone of voice, and I stared up at his face. It was there in his eyes, too, visible despite the careful nonchalance of his expression.

"You like that, don't you?" I asked suspiciously, fluttering my fingers and thinking that it was really too bad that I had not broken my left hand.

He shrugged his shoulders. "Sure," he said, still casual. "It looks very nice on you."

I stared into his eyes, trying to decipher the emotion that smoldered just under the surface. He gazed back, and the casual pretense suddenly slipped away. He was glowing- his angel's face brilliant with joy and victory. He was so glorious that it knocked me breathless.

Before I could catch that breath, he was kissing me, his lips exultant. I was lightheaded when he moved his mouth to whisper in my ear- but his breathing was just as ragged as mine.

"Yes, I like it. You have no idea."


Eclipse

19 days until Breaking Dawn

I shook my head, and laughed glumly. "You make me feel like a villain in a melodrama- twirling my moustache while I try to steal some poor girl's virtue."

His eyes were wary as they flashed across my face, then he quickly ducked down to press his lips against my collarbone.

"That's it, isn't it?" The short laugh that escaped me was more shocked than amused. "You're trying to protect your virtue!" I covered my mouth with my hand to muffle the giggle that followed. The words were so... old-fashioned.

"No, silly girl," he muttered against my shoulder. "I'm trying to protect yours. And you're making it shockingly difficult."


Eclipse

20 days until Breaking Dawn

"Lets, clarify your prerequisites first."

"You know what I want."

"Matrimony." I made it sound like a dirty word.

"Yes." He smiled a wide smile. "To start with."

The shock spoiled my carefully composed expression. "There's more?"

"Well," he said, and his face was calculating. "If you're my wife, then what's mine is yours... like tuition money. So there would be no problem with Dartmouth."

"Anything else? While you're already being absurd?"

"I wouldn't mind some time."

"No. No time. That's a deal breaker right there."

He sighed longingly. "Just a year or two?"

I shook my head, my lips set in a stubborn frown. "Move along to the next one."

"That's it. Unless you'd like to talk cars..."


Eclipse

21 days until Breaking Dawn

"A hand-me-down," he reminded me sternly. He pulled my left wrist away from my leg, and touched the silver bracelet for just a moment. Then he gave me my arm back.

I examined it cautiously. On the opposite side of the chain from the wolf, there now hung a brilliant heart-shaped crystal. It was cut in a million facets, so that even in the subdued light shining from the lamp, it sparkled. I inhaled in a low gasp.

"It was my mother's." He shrugged deprecatingly. "I inherited quite a few baubles like this. I've given some to Esme and Alice both. So, clearly, this is not a big deal in any way."

I smiled ruefully at his assurance.

"But I thought it was a good representation," he continued. "It's hard and cold." He laughed. "And it throws rainbows in the sunlight."

"You forgot the most important similarity," I murmured. "It's beautiful."

"My heart is just as silent," he mused. "And it, too, is yours."


Eclipse

Avoid scurvy, drink a Slurpee!

It's that very special day that only comes once a year. July 11 = Free Slurpee Day!

22 days until Breaking Dawn

"Don't apologize," he said, smiling just a little. "Never be afraid to tell me how you feel, Bella. If this is what you need..." He shrugged. "You are my first priority."

"I didn't mean it that way- like you have too choose me over your family."

"I know that. Besides, that's not what you asked. You gave me two alternatives you could live with, and I chose the one that I could live with. That's how compromise is supposed to work."

I leaned forward and rested my forehead against his chest. "Thank you," I whispered.

"Anytime," he answered, kissing my hair. "Anything."


Eclipse

23 days until Breaking Dawn

His eyes narrowed. "Everyone else is able to get away with giving you things. Everyone but me. I would have loved to get you a graduation present, but I didn't. I knew it would upset you more than if anyone else did. That's utterly unfair. How do you explain yourself?"

"Easy." I shrugged. "You're more important than everyone else. And you've given me you. That's already more than I deserve, and anything else you give me just throws us more out of balance."

He processed that for a moment, and then rolled his eyes. "The way you regard me is ludicrous."


Eclipse

Emergency Zombie Outbreak Kit

What Twitter would look like if we were under attack by Zombies.

24 days until Breaking Dawn

"One more thing," Edward said slowly. "I'll be fighting for her, too. You should know that. I'm not taking anything for granted, and I'll be fighting twice as hard as you will."

"Good," Jacob growled. "It's no fun beating someone who forfeits."

"She is mine." Edward's low voice was suddenly dark, not as composed as before. "I didn't say I would fight fair."


Eclipse

25 days until Breaking Dawn

"I'm in love with you, Bella." Jacob said in a strong, sure voice. "Bella, I love you. And I want you to pick me instead of him. I know you don't feel that way, but I need the truth out there so that you know your options. I wouldn't want a miscommunication to stand in our way."


Eclipse

26 days until Breaking Dawn

"You could do so much better, Bella. I know that you believe I have a soul, but I'm not entirely convinced on that point, and to risk yours..." He shook his head slowly. "For me to allow this- to let you become what I am just so that I'll never have to lose you- is the most selfish act I can imagine. I want it more than anything, for myself. But for you, I want so much more. Giving in- it feels criminal. It's the most selfish thing I'll ever do, even if I live forever."


Eclipse

27 days until Breaking Dawn

"It's late," he said again, murmuring, almost crooning now, his voice smoother than silk. "Sleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love."


Eclipse

28 days until Breaking Dawn

"But I want you to know something- when it comes to all this enemies nonsense, I'm out. I am a neutral country. I am Switzerland. I refuse to be affected by territorial disputes between mythical creatures. Jacob is family. You are... well, not exactly the love of my life, because I expect to love you for much longer than that. The love of my existance. I don't care who's a werewolf and who's a vampire. If Angela turns out to be a witch, she can join the party too."


Eclipse

a confession

I'm known as a pretty organized person. Maybe even obsessively so. But this is the one area of my life that is never organized.

I'm somewhat of a compulsive shopper, and I have trouble getting rid of clothes. And shoes. And purses. I go through my closet several times a year, and every time we move, and I get rid of numerous bags of clothes. But my closet is still a floor to ceiling disaster area.

Whenever I "clean out" my closet, I try on everything, and if it fits and is in good condition, I keep it, and get rid of the rest. That sounds like a good plan, right? But the problem is, just because it fits, doesn't mean I've worn it in the last year. Or ever. The same goes for shoes and purses. Because really, you never know when you might need that reversible Esprit purse (purchased when I was in college) and those Steve Madden platform suede sandals (worn to my bachelorette party- eight years ago).

So this week I decided to tackle the task ruthlessly. I took the afternoon off from work, so there would be no toddler underfoot, and no husband pretending to watch said toddler while also playing the banjo.

I took EVERYTHING out of the closet, and tried to be brutally honest about what needed to be kept. There were far too many clothes that I'd been holding on to for years "just in case" I needed something to wear to a wedding, or a job interview, or a funeral. Or wherever it is vinyl pants get worn. Did you know I owned vinyl pants? I'm somebody's mother for God's sake. And I had far too many shoes that hardly ever get worn because, although they're super cute, they're viciously uncomfortable.

I also had numerous belts. Why? I don't think I've worn a belt since 1988 (and it would have been worn low on top of my over-sized shirt, not through my belt loops).

It was extremely painful getting rid of so many things that I hadn't worn much, or even at all. I do a lot of online shopping, and tend to keep things for the wrong reasons. Because it's such a pain to return items, I convince myself that I'll find a use for them at some point. So now I have to comfort myself with the thought that some lucky plus size girl shopping at Goodwill is going make out like a bandit.

After filling seven Hefty bags, I somehow still seem to have a lot of clothes, shoes and purses. But it's a much more organized selection (now with extra hangers). And now I have room for new stuff!

29 days until Breaking Dawn

"See," I explained. "I don't care who's a vampire and who's a werewolf. That's irrelevent. You are Jacob, and he is Edward, and I am Bella. And nothing else matters."

His eyes narrowed slightly. "But I am a werewolf," he said unwillingly. "And he is a vampire," he added with obvious revulsion.

"And I'm a Virgo!" I shouted exasperated.


Eclipse

30 days until Breaking Dawn

I looked up, intending to make a sarcastic remark, but his face was closer than I expected. His golden eyes were smoldering, just inches away, and his breath was cool against my open lips. I could taste his scent on my tongue.

I couldn't remember the witty response I'd been about to make. I couldn't remember my name.


Eclipse

31 days until Breaking Dawn

It was a face any male model in the world would trade his soul for. Of course, that might be exactly the asking price: one soul.

No. I didn't believe that. I felt guilty for even thinking it, and was glad- as I was often glad- that I was the one person whose thoughts were a mystery to Edward.

I reached for his hand, and sighed when his cold fingers found mine. His touch brought with it the strangest sense of relief- as if I'd been in pain and that pain had suddenly ceased.


Eclipse

32 days until Breaking Dawn

"Thank you," Edward said, and his voice throbbed with the depth of his sincerity. "I will never be able to tell you how grateful I am. I will owe you for the rest of my... existance."

Jacob stared at him blankly, his shudders stilled by surprise. He exchanged a quick glance with me, but my face was just as mystified.

"For keeping Bella alive," Edward clarified, his voice rough and fervent. "When I... didn't."


New Moon

33 days until Breaking Dawn

"Oh!"

"Bella?"

"Oh. Okay. I see."

"Your epiphany?" he asked, his voice uneven and strained.

"You love me," I marveled. The sense of conviction and rightness washed through me again.

Though his eyes were still anxious, the crooked smile I loved best flashed across his face. "Truly, I do."


New Moon

toe ring tattoos

34 days until Breaking Dawn

"But how could you believe me? After all the thousand times I've told you that I love you, how could you let one word break your faith in me?"

I didn't answer. I was too shocked to form a rational response.

"I could see it in your eyes, that you honestly believed that I didn't want you anymore. The most absurd, ridiculous concept- as if there were any way I could exist without needing you!"


New Moon

35 days until Breaking Dawn

"Well Alice," Edward said conversationally as we walked. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised to see you here."

"It was my mistake," Alice answered in the same tone. "It was my job to set it right."

"What happened?" His voice was polite as if he were barely interested. I imagined this was due to the listening ears behind us.

"It's a long story." Alice's eyes flicked toward me and away. "In summary, she did jump off a cliff, but she wasn't trying to kill herself. Bella's all about extreme sports these days."


New Moon

Here’s hoping for 99 years.

On April 23, 1996, 19 year-old Stacey Stites was found murdered on the side of the road in Bastrop county. Stacey’s fiancé, Giddings Police officer Jimmy Fennell was briefly a suspect in her murder.

When Stacey Stites was found, her fingernails were cut to the quick, roughly and not filed, which prevented the medical examiner from collecting any trace evidence. She was strangled with her own belt which left no finger prints.

Investigators never requested a search warrant for the apartment Stacey Stites shared with Jimmy Fennell, the last place she had been seen alive.

The truck apparently used to transport Stacey’s body, which contained fingerprints from only Jimmy Fennell and Stacy Stites, was returned to Fennell six days after the murder (before DPS had even completed all of the necessary forensic testing). Fennell sold the truck the next day.

Fresh beer cans found at the crime scene contained DNA from Stacey Stites and police officers David Hall (who was also a good friend of Fennell’s) and Ed Salmela.

Ed Salmela was originally assigned as lead investigator of Stites' murder. Three months after Samela began investigating the case, he committed suicide.

Dallas police sergeant Mary Blackwell told investigators that she overheard Fennell during an officer training course in 1995. "He said that if he ever found out that his girlfriend was cheating on him that he'd strangle her."

In two polygraph tests, Jimmy Fennell failed the question: "Did you strangle Stacy Stites?"

In 1998, Rodney Reed, a black man who claimed to have been having a secret affair with Stacey Stites (as an explanation for why his DNA was found on her body), was convicted of her murder and sentenced to death. He maintains his innocence and is currently awaiting a ruling on whether he can be retried due to the evidence (including the DNA evidence on the beer cans) that was not released at his trial.

_________________________________________________

In February 2007, Jimmy Fennell, now a Georgetown police officer, was charged with sexually assaulting a woman at gunpoint while he was on the job. He was subsequently fired by the Georgetown Police Department.

Under a deal reached in May 2008, between prosecutors and Fennell’s attorney, Fennell pleaded guilty to felony charges of kidnapping and sexual misconduct.

On June 24, 2008 District Judge Burt Carnes denied the plea agreement that would have given Fennell a two-year prison sentence, 10 years probation and a $5,000 fine. The case will go to trial on Sept. 8.

Fennell is charged with aggravated sexual assault, aggravated kidnapping, improper sexual activity with a person in custody and official oppression — all of which could exceed two 99-year terms if he is convicted by a jury.

36 days until Breaking Dawn

"But he... he left! He didn't want me anymore! What difference does it make now? He knew I would die sometime!"

"I don't think he ever meant to outlive you by long," Alice said quietly.


New Moon

37 days until Breaking Dawn

"You look like hell, Bella."

"I drowned today," I reminded her.

"It goes deeper than that. You're a mess."

I flinched. "Look, I'm doing my best."

"What do you mean?"

"It hasn't been easy. I'm working on it."

She frowned. "I told him," she said to herself.

"Alice," I sighed. "What did you think you were going to find? I mean, besides me dead? Did you expect to find me skipping around and whistling show tunes? You know me better than that."

"I do. But I hoped."

"Then I guess I don't have the corner on the idiocy market."

New Moon

38 days until Breaking Dawn

"It hurts to think about them," I whispered. "It's like I can't breathe... like I'm breaking into pieces..." It was bizarre how much I could tell Jacob now. We had no more secrets.

He smoothed my hair. "It's okay, Bella, it's okay. I won't bring it up again. I'm sorry."

"I'm fine," I gasped. "Happens all the time. Not your fault."

"We're a pretty messed-up pair, aren't we?" Jacob said. "Neither one of can hold our shape together right."


New Moon

39 days until Breaking Dawn

He frowned at me in the darkness. "Try to sleep, Bella."

"No, I want you to kiss me again."

"You're overestimating my self-control."

"Which is tempting you more, my blood or my body?" I challenged.

"It's a tie." He grinned briefly in spite of himself, and was serious again. "Now why don't you stop pushing your luck and go to sleep?"

New Moon

40 days until Breaking Dawn

"You were deeply asleep; I didn't miss anything." His eyes gleamed. "The talking came earlier."

I groaned. "What did I say?"

"You said you love me."

"You knew that already," I reminded him, ducking my head.

"It was nice to hear just the same."

I hid my face against his shoulder.

"I love you," I whispered.

"You are my life now," he said simply.


Twilight

41 days until Breaking Dawn

"Don't be self-conscious," he whispered in my ear. "If I could dream at all, it would be about you. And I'm not ashamed of it."


Twilight

tattoos

Blue dragonfly - October 1997
Red daisy - March 2004
Black flaming chalice - April 2006
Black zodiac symbols (Libra, Leo, Aries) - June 2008

You, like Rob, might be wondering... isn't she done yet?

Since I don't have a toe ring tattoo, a pink crown, or a John Prine homage... nope, not done.

Excellent.

Alfred Hitchcock + Barbie = Awesome

42 days until Breaking Dawn

"How often?" I asked casually.

"Hmm?"

"How often did you come here?"

"I come here almost every night."


Twilight

flickr meme

1. Kandis BBQ flower(1), 2. Pepperoni Rolls, 3. Sidney Lanier High School, 4. i can taste summer! a.k.a. childhood summer! a.k.a. childhood reminiscence! a.k.a. those were the good times!, 5. My cousin George!, 6. Drink Dr. Pepper!, 7. Morton Castle, 8. 14th August 2007 / Day 226, 9. Back from my Méditerranée villa, 10. Cooper, 11. demanding, 12. Future Knitter?

You can play too.

corn dog air freshener

Why don't I have this??

43 days until Breaking Dawn

"Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you."

"You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever."

Twilight

44 days until Breaking Dawn

"So what you're saying is, I'm your brand of heroin?" I teased, trying to lighten the mood.

He smiled swiftly, seeming to appreciate my effort.

"Yes, you are exactly my brand of heroin."

Twilight

45 days until Breaking Dawn

"Do you truly believe that you care for me more than I do for you?" he murmered.

"You're doing it again," I muttered.

"What?"

"Dazzling me," I admitted.

"Oh," he frowned.

"It's not your fault," I sighed. "You can't help it."

"Are you going to answer the question?"

"Yes I really think that."


Twilight

46 days until Breaking Dawn

"You're dangerous?" I guessed, my pulse quickening as I intuitively realized the truth of my own words. He was dangerous. He'd been trying to tell me that all along.

He looked at me, eyes full of some emotion I couldn't comprehend.

"But not bad," I whispered, shaking my head. "No, I don't believe that you're bad."

"You're wrong." His voice was almost inaudible.

Twilight

47 days until Breaking Dawn

"It would be more... prudent for you to be not my friend," he explained. "But I'm tired of trying to stay away from you, Bella."
His eyes were gloriously intense as he uttered that last sentence, his voice smoldering. I couldn't remember how to breathe.

Twilight

48 days until Breaking Dawn

"Honestly , Edward." I felt a thrill go through me as I said his name, and I hated it. "I can't keep up with you. I thought you didn't want to be my friend."

"I said it was better if we weren't friends, not that I didn't want to be."

Twilight

49 days until Breaking Dawn

That was the first night I dreamed of Edward Cullen.

Twilight

50 days until Breaking Dawn

"My name is Edward Cullen," he continued. "I didn't have a chance to introduce myself last week. You must be Bella Swan."

Twilight

Breaking Dawn Countdown

Breaking Dawn, book four in the Twilight Saga, will be released on August 2. To celebrate the most exciting thing to happen since the birth of my son, I'll be posting some of my favorite moments from the series leading up to the big day.

Wanted: Shallow, TV and junk food addicted BFF

• If you cry like a baby at episodes of "One Tree Hill"...
• If you are desperately in need of a pedicure...
• If you still love Hole...
• If you wonder why the kids on "Gossip Girl" disparage the '90's but then wear Alice bands without a hint of irony...
• If you consider Honey BBQ Fritos and a Slurpee to be a complete lunch...
• If you miss "My So-Called Life", "Veronica Mars", and "Deadwood" on an appallingly regular basis...
• If you have a "What would Buffy do?" bumpersticker...
• If you plan to be at the theater on Dec. 12 (possibly calling in sick to work) to see the premiere of Twilight with all the other 13 year-old fangirls...
• If you can eat your weight in chocolate chip cookies...
• If you have Robin Hood Prince of Thieves currently sitting on your DVR...
• If you have your next three tattoos picked out, but don't know where to put them...
• If you have a spare ticket to the New Kids on the Block show in San Antonio...

Then we should be best friends.

I'm starting to worry...

that they have discontinued my beloved Hamburger Helper Three Cheese.

love

It's official. I am a 13 year-old girl.

It took me a day and a half to read the 544 pages of Twilight. It’s the completely absorbing love story between Bella, a 17 year-old girl and Edward, a beautiful 100 year-old vampire. Very “Buffy” yes, but with much less ass kicking and set in the Pacific Northwest. Bonus? Lots less sunlight.

The story manages to be amazingly romantic in spite of being bizarrely chaste (apparently the author is Mormon). There’s a bit too much “grimacing”, “glaring”, “glowering” and “hissing”, but it is a first novel, and the heroine is a teenager.

The novel is classified as Young Adult, which definitely makes it embarassing to read in the doctor's office. Especially when you're the person who when people rave about Harry Potter, you say "that's nice, but I'm an adult". The teenage characters and the lack of sex are probably enough to qualify for the YA distinction, but I personally found it far more riveting and well written than the equally chaste Da Vinci Code.

All in all, ridiculously entertaining fluff. I’m moving on to the sequel as soon as it arrives. Gives me just enough time to catch up on “Gossip Girl”.

This time last year, we got the best present ever.

Happy Birthday Cooper! Mama loves.

Am I too old to be a groupie?

They may be pushing 40, but the New Kids are returning to the block.

An album and a tour? I am ridiculously excited.

since I was really just twittering anyway...

I might as well Twitter.

white

"When engaging in a conversation about corporate evils it is important to NEVER, EVER mention Apple Computers, Target or Ikea in the same breath as the companies mentioned earlier. White people prefer to hate corporations that don’t make stuff that they like."

Stuff White People Like

Bitch is the new black!

I'm predicting a Hillary win in Texas.

Bitches get stuff done.

Did I mention the only movie I saw last year was "Knocked Up"?

Okay, eight out of 12 isn't so bad.

I should have gone with my first instinct and skipped over Atonement for Adapted Screenplay. I still maintain that Sweeney Todd should have won for Costume Design. Elizabeth: The Golden Age was very elaborate of course, but haven't we been there, done that? Sweeney Todd was far more creative.

Right before Oscar weekend, I started to hear things about Marion Cotillard in La Vie en Rose, but I dismissed it. Who could have forseen a big win for a subtitled performance? And then Tilda Swinton? For real? She had to have been the least favored in that category. Someone won a lot of money on that bet, but it sure wasn't me.

You mean he doesn't wear that blue shirt just because it's my favorite?

So I was checking CNN to see if my first love, Anderson Cooper, would be moderating the Clinton/Obama debate in Austin tonight. But apparently, he's going to settle for commenting from his studio. Then I came across a recent blog entry of his, and apparently he's become quite adept at spotting the stalkers:

"As most of you know, there is a big difference between being a fan, or a regular viewer and being a stalker. What’s the difference? Well if you have to ask yourself that question, that’s probably not a good sign. But here’s a handy guide in case you are…well…confused.

1. If you’ve been contacted by authorities and asked not to attempt to contact me further… but you still do, there’s a good chance you’ve crossed the line.
   
2. If you’ve attempted to gain entry to my apartment under false pretenses, and can’t imagine why that might be inappropriate, that’s another red flag.


3. If you believe I am secretly communicating to you online, or with the clothes I wear, or by telepathy through your radiator, that’s a problem as well.


4. If you have read the last three items and laughed, or said, “wow, that’s weird” you are not a stalker.


5. If you have read items 1-3 and notice they apply to you, but then tell yourself they actually don’t apply to you. Well, that’s not good."
   

P.S. Anderson? This is stalking.

Do think she told the plastic surgeon "just make me look like Jessica Rabbit"?

2008 Oscar Picks

No money will be changing hands. This year is simply too easy. Not like last year when I couldn't pick Best Picture for the life of me. The only categories I don't feel really confident about this time around are Best Documentary and Adapted Screenplay. And really? Nobody cares about those categories except the nominees. No Country for Old Men seems a shoe-in for Adapted Screenplay, but I feel like the Academy will want to show Atonement some love somewhere. And I have to sort of disagree with Ebert again.

"My heart cries out "Juno! Juno! Juno!," but my brain dashes a pail of cold water and sternly corrects me: "No Country for Old Men." To be sure, "There Will Be Blood" cleaned up a lot of the year-end critics' prizes, but is a little too dark and odd for the academy. "Atonement" and "Michael Clayton" are excellent, but don't have the buzz. Dark horse: "Juno," because the Academy may go for an upbeat audience pleaser. Besides, according to me, it really is the best film of the year. "

Juno will not be winning Best Picture. They're this year's Little Miss Sunshine. Universally beloved, but too feel good for the Academy's highest honor.

Performance by an actor in a leading role
Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood

Performance by an actor in a supporting role
Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men

Performance by an actress in a leading role
Julie Christie, Away from Her

Performance by an actress in a supporting role
Ruby Dee, American Gangster

Best animated feature film of the year
Ratatouille

Achievement in cinematography
There Will Be Blood

Achievement in costume design
Sweeney Todd

Achievement in directing
Joel Coen, Ethan Coen, No Country for Old Men

Best documentary feature
Taxi to the Dark Side

Adapted screenplay
Christopher Hampton, Atonement

Original screenplay
Diablo Cody, Juno

Best motion picture of the year
No Country for Old Men

my Valentines

Vote, and don't get run over by a float.

Did you know that today is not only Super Tuesday, it's Fat Tuesday?

It's an all around impressive Tuesday.

Spring time in January

You've been warned.

Do not try Cherry Chocolate Diet Dr. Pepper.

Unless of course you like the taste of a liquified NutraSweet Tootsie Roll.

In which case... Freak.

It's uncanny. It looks just like me!

You can have one too.

What does a girl have to do to get some pants on Eternia?

Screw Christmas.

This is the most magical time of year.

"We're Texas Rangers! Our jurisdiction is wherever we happen to be!"

I haven't really been watching "Comanche Moon". I've read Lonesome Dove probably 50 times, and have seen the movie nearly that many times. But I still haven't gotten around to reading the prequels Dead Man's Walk and Comanche Moon. I briefly attempted the sequel, Streets of Laredo, but it was dismal.

So anyway, I stopped to watch for a few minutes tonight and got drawn in for a while. The reviews I read weren't very good, and I mostly agree. The actors just aren't the same caliber as the original. I was a little bit put off by the casting of Steve Zahn as Gus McCrae (you know, one of the most beloved characters in American literature?). Zahn always comes off as so goofy in his films. Though I know Gus is supposed to be somewhat of a joker, it just didn't seem like the right choice. But I've actually been surprised at how captivating he is. That is one masterful Duvall impression. Now I might have to watch the whole damn thing... Except then I'd have to put up with Kilmer. And that's asking a bit much.

Helena Bonham Carter = Crazy

But in an awesome way, not in a Britney way.

cleaning house

So, not to brag or anything, but I get to throw all of this stuff away.














(How I have managed to amass this much stuff is a whole nother entry. Seriously, how many contact lens cases does one person need?)

This Friday afternoon, I'm getting Lasik! And by Saturday, I should be able to drive without glasses. I've been legally required to drive with corrective lenses since I was 16 years-old. So this is a little exciting.

One down side, I won't be able to wear eye makeup for at least a week, which to me, is way scarier than having my cornea sliced open with a lazer. And hopefully, when it's all said and done, I'll love my new eyes. Because I'll be paying them off for the next five years. Although just out of curiosity, what happens if you default on your Lasik financing? Do they take their 20/20 back?

Happy New Year, Texas Style

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris bites the hand that made him relevent again.

This means you.

There's a person at work who is forever talking on the cell phone while in the restroom. For a while I thought I was the only one maddened by this rude and inconsiderate behavior. But at the office Christmas party, I learned I wasn't the only one driven to insanity by this woman treating the ladies room as her own personal phone booth.

Shortly after the office Christmas party, the following sign was placed on the restroom door:

Please be courteous.
The public restroom is not the place for a cell phone conversation.
Thank you.

And for a couple of weeks, all was well. But yet again, the woman was spotted walking into the bathroom with her phone glued to her ear today. I can only assume she thought that sign was meant for someone else, surely not for her. So in order to make things absolutely clear, I'd really like to make the following edits to that sign (when no one is looking):

Please be courteous.
The public restroom is not the place for a cell phone conversation, Hacky McSmoker's Cough.*
Thank you.

*Offender's actual name will be substituted on the bathroom sign.

This is only a test.

We had a fire drill today at the building where I work. And the building management has made a habit of providing ice cream in the parking garage where we all gather after evacuating. One time it was Amy’s ice cream, our choice of chocolate or Mexican vanilla. And the last two times, it’s been bins of popsicles, ice cream sandwiches etc. like the ones they have at convenience stores.

I predict that in the event of an actual emergency, we’re all going to be very disappointed by the lack of snacks.

the newest outsourcing

Wombs for Rent in India

This is what obsession looks like.

These are my newest favorite things (not counting the cutest baby in the whole world).

They're called Sugar Shoes. They're so cute and fun, and vegan (I'm not, but hey, it doesn't hurt) and affordable. And I can't get enough of them. I have them on my Amazon and Kaboodle wishlists, I troll for them online constantly, and I bought the green ones entirely because they were on sale. Now I have to buy more green clothes.

The shoes are extremely comfortable. I buy about a 1/2 size bigger than I would normally, simply because they tend to be narrow, and I have wide troll feet. The canvas flats are only around $35, and I picked up the silly green ones for $10 at Amazon. I'm currently coveting the super cute wedge style. Feel free to make that my Christmas gift!

All shoes should be this fun.

Christmas meme

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Both, though I like the act of wrapping presents. It makes it feel more like Christmas. Although my OCD tendencies shudder at the thought of wrapping oddly shaped presents.

2. Real or artificial tree? We always used to get real, but we have less and less room for them every year. So last year we bought a very narrow artificial one. It's tall enough to feel real, but without the mess, and gives us more options for placement. But I miss the smell of a real one.

3. When do you put up the tree? Usually not until the first weekend in December. But this year we put it up Thanksgiving weekend since the in-laws were going to be in town. And hey, bonus of having a fake tree? It won't be dropping needles and dying on us come Christmas day.

4. When do you take the tree down? The day after Christmas, without fail. Once the presents are unwrapped, it doesn't feel like Christmas anymore.

5. Do you like eggnog? Yes, but in moderation. This year we discovered the joys of eggnog ice cream. Yum!

6. Favorite gift received as a child? It's tough to remember. My mom wishes I'd say "the horse" I got in fourth grade. But I think I'll have to go with my beloved Speak & Spell.

7. Do you have a nativity scene? Puhleeze. Have you met me? We're one step away from pagan equinox rituals.

8. Hardest person to buy for? Rob's dad. If he wanted it, he already bought it.

9. Easiest person to buy for? Myself. I have not just an Amazon wishlist, but a Kaboodle wishlist, for all the stuff that can't be found at Amazon. Oh, but also Cooper. He's only eight months-old, so he hasn't collected every toy known to man yet. And he's not very choosy, since it all just goes in his mouth anyway.

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? There really aren't any bad presents.

11. Mail or email Christmas cards? Some years we manage mass produced cards with photos of us on them, and this year I had every intention of ordering them. But God, then they have to be addressed, and I have to buy more stamps, and there are never any photos of me without my double chin, so just, no.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Scrooged, Bad Santa, The Family Stone, and I will totally be watching any Lifetime network Christmas themed movie featuring Rob Lowe.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Sometime in December, usually before I have to start paying for express shipping.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? I doubt it, but if I have, like I'd admit it?

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? My chocolate chip cookies, red and green M&Ms, whatever my mom has baked up, and gingerbread with whipped cream (not gingerbread cookies).

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Clear only. And for God's sake, no freaking tinsel. And yes, I have a lot of rules.

17. Favorite Christmas song? "So This is Christmas", "Hard Candy Christmas" (which is not a Christmas song, but that's the only time it gets played on the radio), and I have this unexplainable love for Trisha Yearwood's Jesusy "It Wasn't His Child".

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Usually only travel as far as my mom's in Bastrop. Some years we've gone as far as Dallas. Some year we're going to make it up to Rob's family in New York. But damn it's expensive to fly at the holidays.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Dasher, Dancer, Donner, Blitzen, Comet, Cupid, Prancer, Vixen, and Rudolph.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? A lighted rattan star. It's rustic without being redneck.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or Christmas morning? One present on Christmas Eve, the rest on Christmas morning. Unless we have to leave early the next morning, then we open them all at night. But don't tell.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? Crowds, crowds, and more crowds. And people who think they need to spend a lot of money to make Christmas nice.

23. Do you decorate your tree in any specific theme or color? All kinds of individually selected ornaments (lots of snowmen and Barbies), with some matching ones and candy canes interspersed. And white lights of course.

24. What do/did you leave for Santa? Cookies and milk. I never understood why Santa didn't finish all the cookies. I could never let good cookies go to waste like that.

The Dark Knight

Anyone else bothered by The Joker's new Clockwork Orange look?

Makes me prefer this:

They're vegetarians!

John Scalzi went to the Creation Museum, so we don’t have to. (via)

Today I realized...

I am either never wrong, or just incapable of admitting that I'm wrong.

In conversation I frequently use the qualifier "I could be wrong but..."
But I'm just being polite.
Or I'm just trying to soften the verbal blow.
Or I'm just pretending like I'm the kind of person who would consider another viewpoint.

But it's a lie. I don't actually ever believe that I'm wrong.

And yes, I realize how unpleasant that makes me sound. Hopefully I have some good traits that balance that out. Or maybe just some less obnoxious flaws.

Worst Job Ever?

Britney Spears' court appointed parental visitation monitor/unpaid babysitter.

Happy Halloween to you and yours.

And remember, as my mother always said, don't eat all of the candy in one sitting.

Even The New York Times loves Jordan Catalano

"This life has been a test. If it had been an actual life, you would have received actual instructions on where to go and what to do."

The Times gets all nostalgic about Angela Chase and "My So-Called Life" just in time for the spanking new box set to be released tomorrow. I myself have the original box set, released five years ago with absolutely no bonus features. The new set will include all kinds of cast interviews and bonus footage. Which will just serve to remind me of how much I miss flannel.

In summary

Did you know they now have a test to determine if you have the flu? And they now have a prescription medicine specifically for the flu? However, the catch is, the test only works within the first two days of symptoms. After that, the test isn't conclusive and they won't give you the medicine. Wow. How much do I wish I'd known that two days ago?

So in summary? It's probably best to just get the damned flu shot.

Things I've Learned on My Way to 30 (otherwise known as my second annual 29th birthday)

The quest for the perfect pair of jeans never ever ends.

I was right back in high school: nobody ever really uses algebra.

You can be too old for some clothes.

There's a difference between a job and a career. And that difference can be felt.

My bra-less days (if ever there were any) are long, long over.

Even when you grow up, eating all of the Halloween candy in one sitting will still make you sick.

There's less reason to get embarassed as I get older. People are human, nobody is perfect. And who cares what they think anyway?

Moisturizer is very important.

So is sunscreen.

I'm still going to get wrinkles.

Having a baby doesn't really change everything. But it makes things a lot sweeter.

The world may never be fair, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't keep trying to make it that way.

Tattoos don't look that weird on grandmas.

I don't care if I'm too old for pigtails.

We'll never stop needing help from our parents. Especially if they can wield a chainsaw and a sewing machine with equal skill.

There's no such thing as enough shoes.

As much as I try not to pass judgement on other people for the way they live their lives... some people are just stupid.

80's fashion didn't look good then, and it definitely doesn't look good now.

There may actually be a heaven. And it's called Retirement.

Forever really isn't that long.

Apparently I suck at Emmy betting.

So I had an off year.

The only categories I called correctly were Best Drama, and Best Actress and Supporting Actress in a comedy series. Oh, and Best Variety, Music or Comedy Series.

So four out of 12 isn't very impressive. But can you blame me? Who'd have thought they'd give it to James Spader AGAIN? I'm not a "Sopranos" fan, but even I knew it was Gandolfini's year. And Ricky Gervais and Jeremy Piven? Based on the insane "Deadwood" snubbing, I wast starting to assume the Academy is too cheap to foot the bill for HBO.

Scenes from an Anniversary

Need a charity deduction?

If you can, please consider supporting me, and the Allen's Angels team, in the Out of the Darkness Walk for suicide prevention.

I've been thinking about it...

And I'm gonna have to go ahead and disagree with you America.

This is a lot of things. But it's not my idea of "fat".

Tired of your sullen 13 year-old? Marry her off!

"At first we were worried that Janine was too young to get married, but then her new husband bought her a house and a car and jewelry and the money we got let us buy a house for ourselves. Getting out of the trailer park at our age was the best thing that ever happened to us, and it’s all thanks to Marry Our Daughter!"—Mr. Jack M.

“Our 15 year old daughter Mary wasn’t very popular and did nothing but mope around the house bringing everybody down, so we decided to marry her off through your site. Now our house is a lot cheerier and we love our new swimming pool and Jaccuzi! We’ve told our youngest that when she turns 15 we’re going to marry her off too!" —Mrs. James P.

And yes, I realize that it's a joke.

Before and After

The water damage repairs are finely done. Photos have been posted. Now if only the kitchen had flooded too...

stats

To the person who found my blog by searching for "what kind of pants should be worn with slouch boots"... The answer is NONE, because slouch boots should never be worn. Trust me on this.

To the people who are forever ending up at my blog due to their feverish Googling of "are danny and melinda from the real world austin still together?" Sorry, you've really come to the wrong place. I made one offhand comment about those two crazy kids after watching the reunion special. And I swear, I regret it now.

And to the person who found my blog by searching for "god wants your ass"? You have big problems my friend.

In Austin? Hate Genocide?

Did you ever wonder: "What can I do to help end the genocide in Darfur?" All you have to do is go out and enjoy a meal in an Austin restaurant participating in the Dining for Darfur dine-out on Monday, August 27 and you'll be providing aid for the people of Sudan and Chad currently suffering from the violence, destruction and displacement. At the restaurant that evening you may even learn more ways of to help us call an end to the genocide that is happening in this region.

Participating restaurants will donate 5% of their gross sales to the American Jewish World Service (AJWS). Donations will be used for AJWS's nonsectarian humanitarian relief efforts for the victims in Darfur.

Participating Restaurants:

Arturo's
Blue Star Cafeteria
Chez Zee
Curra's Grill (all 3 locations)
Frank & Angie's Pizzeria
Freddie's Place
H-E-B Kosher Store Grill
Hut's Hamburgers
It's Italian
Kenichi
Lambert's Downtown BBQ
Leaf
Louie's 106
Manny Hattan's New York Delicatessen
Mars
Ms. B's Authentic Creole Restaurant
Opal Divine's (all 3 locations—Order a "Velocirita" and Velocity Bank will match a $1 contribution for every drink sold that day!)
Pluckers Wing Bar (all 5 locations)
Restaurant Jezebel
San Antonio Street Cafe
Spicy Pickle
Suzi's China Grill (all 3 locations)
Taco Deli (both locations)
Taverna
Tom's Tabooley
Upper Crust Bakery
Waterloo Ice House (6th and Lamar location only)

I've said it before...

"Democrats resolutely refuse to tell the poor the secret to not being poor: Keep your knees together until marriage."

For real y'all. Bitch be crazy.

I don't see anything wrong with this picture.

Testing My Emmy Luck

The Emmys are on Sunday, September 16. So I'll see if I can repeat my Oscar success.

DRAMA

SERIES:
"Boston Legal" (ABC)
"Grey's Anatomy" (ABC)
"Heroes" (NBC)
"House" (Fox)
"The Sopranos" (HBO)

ACTOR:
James Spader, "Boston Legal"
Hugh Laurie, "House"
Denis Leary, "Rescue Me"
James Gandolfini, "The Sopranos"
Kiefer Sutherland, "24"

SUPPORTING ACTOR:
William Shatner, "Boston Legal"
T.R. Knight, "Grey's Anatomy"
Masi Oka, "Heroes"
Michael Emerson, "Lost"
Terry O'Quinn, "Lost"
Michael Imperioli, "The Sopranos"

ACTRESS:
Sally Field, "Brothers & Sisters"
Kyra Sedgwick, "The Closer"
Mariska Hargitay, "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"
Patricia Arquette, "Medium"
Minnie Driver, "The Riches"
Edie Falco, "The Sopranos"

SUPPORTING ACTRESS:
Rachel Griffiths, "Brothers & Sisters"
Katherine Heigl, "Grey's Anatomy"
Chandra Wilson, "Grey's Anatomy"
Sandra Oh, "Grey's Anatomy"
Aida Turturro, "The Sopranos"
Lorraine Bracco, "The Sopranos"

COMEDY

SERIES:
"Entourage" (HBO)
"The Office" (NBC)
"30 Rock" (NBC)
"Two and a Half Men" (CBS)
"Ugly Betty" (ABC)

ACTOR:
Ricky Gervais, "Extras"
Tony Shalhoub, "Monk"
Steve Carell, "The Office"
Alec Baldwin, "30 Rock"
Charlie Sheen, "Two and a Half Men"

SUPPORTING ACTOR:
Kevin Dillon, "Entourage"
Jeremy Piven, "Entourage"
Neil Patrick Harris, "How I Met Your Mother"
Rainn Wilson, "The Office"
Jon Cryer, "Two and a Half Men"

ACTRESS:
Felicity Huffman, "Desperate Housewives"
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, "The New Adventures of Old Christine"
Tina Fey, "30 Rock"
America Ferrera, "Ugly Betty"
Mary-Louise Parker, "Weeds"

SUPPORTING ACTRESS:
Jaime Pressly, "My Name Is Earl"
Jenna Fischer, "The Office"
Holland Taylor, "Two and a Half Men"
Conchata Ferrell, "Two and a Half Men"
Vanessa Williams, "Ugly Betty"
Elizabeth Perkins, "Weeds"

VARIETY, MUSIC, OR COMEDY PROGRAM

SERIES:
"The Colbert Report" (Comedy Central)
"The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" (Comedy Central)
"Late Night With Conan O'Brien" (NBC)
"Late Show With David Letterman" (CBS)
"Real Time With Bill Maher" (HBO)

REALITY-COMPETITION PROGRAM:
"The Amazing Race" (CBS)
"American Idol" (Fox)
"Dancing With the Stars" (ABC)
"Project Runway" (Bravo)
"Top Chef" (Bravo)

Happy 32nd Birthday to the best daddy.